Lost without you...

Here I am alone on a friday night... long long time since i had been alone... it's like back to the past again... sitting here all alone listening to my winamp... listening to the silent surrounding... my home is not as warm as i always hope that it will be... everyone is always busy with their own stuff... i'm like that too, guilty of all that coldness that it is now...

I'm not scared or uneasy about it or as fustrated as before... my temper now a fraction of my past self, i think i can bear alot of unhappiness and be as cold as nothing... my baby say i have alot of hatred in me... is it a bad thing? It's what makes me able to bear all these... all these coldness that co-exist whenever i'm alone... but now i'm not alone... i know i'll always have my baby around... i wan to be strong for her... i used to wan to only be accountable to myself... strong so that i can survive... so that i can count on myself to move forward in life when there is nothing to fall back on...

Having someone who is always there for you is a bonus... knowing that your family is always behond you, knowing that you have friends to accompany you on lonely nights... having someone who calls to check if you are ok... asking about how's your life... all these are a gift... but not all of us have it... some of us still live hidden behind a cloak of shadows... Let there be light, so that the world can be a better place to live in... so much competition in life - always have to be at the front, stepping over others so one can climb higher in life, live in bigger house, drive bigger cars... but that's life... at least in singapore...

Baby ah baay... where are you? Hope you are okie in KL k? ... Pat pat... my dear baby...